Mass Effect:UTF: Sabaton Chaos
by FPSLiverpool
Summary: a side story to a story I am doing collab with VR Commando ATA and DBD Turdukken X


Mass Effect: UTF: Sabaton Chaos

This is FPS Liverpool with a side story to the one I am co-writing with VR Commando ATA and DBD Turdukken X. this is something with I think will be semi-canon (not base mass effect, but Mass Effect:UTF) and omake rolled into one... I find it hard to take some things seriously. _Understatement of the year!_... SHUT IT LUNA... _Which_ one?...ALL OF YOU... Sorry about that, I really should have thought better than the pain in the ass personality for my army of Luna's.

Oh and yes, some of Iwasawa's personality is a shameless rip of Yukari akiyama from GUP

 **NORMANDY SHUTTLE/FIGHTER BAY**

"so, let me get this straight" Seras Elizabeth began, "a guy wearing a band t-shirt, jeans and boots just randomly gave you a almost scrapped Sabaton class?" "Yep, isn't it awesome, ooooh what weapons should it have" Iwasawa 'Yukari' Gaunt replied, with her usual over-excitement that new armoured vehicles always brought in. "panzer halt" Seras exclaimed, as it seemed to snap Yukari out of her rampages. "where is this guy anyway? And are you sure that this isn't stolen?" Seras asked a slightly dejected Yukari. "hang on, checking the ships database. Before us, the owner was one...Black Baron of Destruction? A fake name if ever there was one... ah, this ship is a decommissioned Sabaton mkIII, more armour than the current mkVI but the engines are lacking, as well as only having 2 Gatling repeaters in the nose instead of four." Yukari replied, as she browsed the ships computer. "no markers are out for this ships transponder, it is perfectly legal...and to answer where the guy is, he said something about picking a fight with a krogan, so I doubt he'll ever show up again." Yukari then leaves the ship, proceeding to stand back and look at the Sabaton, Seras moving over to stand next to her. They both overlook the ship, which looks like the old Avro Vulcan bomber, the paint all scratched away from misuse, the hard points dangling, and the smell of leaking oil filling the air. "isn't she a beauty" Yukari exclaims...BANG...just as the port engine mounting gives way.

 **RECONSTUCTION OF SABATON MKIII. DAY 1**

The remains of the engine has remained on the floor as Yukari and Seras stare at it, wondering what the hell they have gotten themselves into. After gawping at the wreckage they hope to make space worthy once more for 10 minutes, they start making a list of what they need to do. Which includes stripping off any weapons (WATCH OUT... *phchew* uh oh...MEDIC...sorry Dave), checking the armour (*BANG* Seras stop kicking it, *BANG * why whats the worst that could *BANG* *CRUNCH* ARGH MY FOOT... told you), Checking the damage to the engines (their fucked...yep) and the computer systems (this is LTS68539146-r69 UNSC AI designation Lotus...wrong story, oops sorry). All this chaos in just the first day was not a good sign for the days and weeks to come.

 **RECONSTRUCTION DAY 2**

"we are going to need a lot more beer, Bruce" Yukari shouts out. "too right Bruce" Seras replies. "haven't you had enough yet?" Garrus calls out, "you've not stopped drinking since you got here...and isn't bruce a human males name?" both Seras and Yukari grin mischievously "right you are Bruce, but we are both honorary Bruce's from the philosophy department of the university of woolamaloo." "She's Bruce Devil." and she's Bruce Armour" they both break out laughing. "want to hear the song of the philosophy department bruce?" Yukari asks garrus. "I'm almost afraid to say it, but go ahead" Garrus replies. The mischievous grins return. "Bruce flyer, Put the Philosophy music on." Seras calls out to joker. "gotcha Bruce Devil" joker replies. "gotta love it when another graduate has access to the ships speakers, right Bruce." Seras says to Yukari. "too right Bruce." the both stand on an intact part of the ship. "any time Bruce" Seras calls out. And then the musics starts... "Immanuel Kant was a real pissant, Who was very rarely stable, Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar, Who could think you under the table, David Hume could out-consume, Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel, And Wittgenstein was a beery swine, Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel  
There's nothing Nietzche couldn't teach ya,'Bout the raising of the wrist,Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed  
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will, On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill, Plato, they say, could stick it away, Half a crate of whiskey every day, Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle, Hobbes was fond of his dram, And René Descartes was a drunken fart, I drink, therefore I am  
Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed, A lovely little thinker, But a bugger when he's pissed"

Both Seras and Yukari belt out, before passing out due to the shear amount of alcohol they had consumed. Garrus however had quickly backed off, having realized how mentally unstable the too women are.

 **RESTORATION DAY 3**

after the hangover had subsided, Seras and Yukari got back to work on the restorations and made planes for what they wanted doing to it. "SPEAKERS" "MORE GUNS" SPEAKERS" "MORE GUNS" was the continues argument. This went on for half of the day, before they realised that half the hull had been irreparable damaged (I TOLD YOU NOT TO KICK IT...I know) and both engines were only good for spare parts. So of course they needed to requestion a pair of engines, a new power plant for the engines, and a shitton of hull plating, which let to another problem... CAT VIDEOS... now to you and me, they may not seem like much of a problem, however they seem to have time warping power, you start watching and you say okay, maybe one or two, only 5 mins max... and you think there you go, 5 minutes is up, you look up and...oh shit, its December...it was February when you started... but that's beside the point...since 2 years has past. Any way, whilst they are browsing cat videos, they have a slight psychic boot up the ass, and order the new parts, including the a set of Tea Empire Armories sub light engines, Elysium Empires Power Generation unit, and Hauberkan Heavy Armour. But one think eluded them. A name. The name for the ship. "the doomslayer?" "nah, The empresses' blessing?" "hell no!...how about... The Mad Larkin?" "after the sniper?" "yep." "I like it" and thus 'The Mad Larkin' was christened.

 **NEXT TIME**

 **a Krogan with a headache, BEER, more weapons failures and a Panzer VII Lowe**


End file.
